December 3, 2019
Bride Guide #17 from SLC Utah wedding photographer Lauren Kay Photography.
One of the first and most important decisions you have to make is who you’re going to share your day with.
I love this quote.
Make it about you and the people you love. Rather than starting with a mental list of all the people that will be invited – aunts, uncles, cousins, best friends – just start with the two of you. Just you and your groom. Then carefully add each name to the list. You do not need to invite everyone you’ve ever known. Let me say that again. You do not need to invite everyone you’ve ever known. If it’s someone you are not close to right now, I wouldn’t invite them.
Here’s why. When I talked with one of my good married friends, she said that she felt the normal pressure to invite everyone – cousins, aunts and uncles, second cousins, you name it. When she walked into her sealing, she felt like she had walked into a room of strangers. Rather than seeing a close-knit group of their closest family and best friends, she was surrounded by people she didn’t really care to have there. On the most important day of her life. I made the same mistake. And the same goes for your celebration as well.
To be honest, going to wedding receptions of people I’m only marginally close to is just a hassle anyway. Most people go to receptions because they feel obligated to! But when I’m close to the couple? There’s nowhere else I’d rather be. So ease everyone’s stress and remember, you only need to invite the people you really want there.
Resist the urge to invite people out of obligation. Will they be offended? Yes, they might. But that is their choice, not yours. You and your groom should carefully decide each person you want to be surrounded by on the most important day of your life, especially for the sealing/ceremony.
This is your wedding day. It is not your parent’s. We love them! This isn’t their day. There is a good chance your parents will want you to invite people to your sealing/ceremony and celebration that you don’t care to have there. This isn’t their wedding. If your parents would like to invite a few of their closest friends, that’s great! If they truly are your parents’ closest friends, you’ll know them too. Stand your ground on the list of people you and your groom decide to invite.
The number of people at your wedding is not a reflection of how well-liked you are or your self-worth. Don’t feel like you need to invite a certain number of people. Remember, your guest list starts with the two of you and each and every name after that should be carefully added by you and your groom. There does not need to be a ton of people there for it to be meaningful and memorable. The opposite is more likely true. Keep in mind, every person invited who you are not close to takes your time away those you are closest to.
When making your guest list, consider:
Remember, you can invite someone to the celebration without inviting them to the sealing/ceremony.
If you want to invite acquaintances and people you don’t know intimately, I strongly recommend doing it on a day other than your actual wedding day. Have an open house later. Do a big bridal shower earlier. But unless it is totally you and your groom’s style to invite a ton of people, reserve your actual wedding day for those closest to you so that you can actually share it with those you care about most.