November 26, 2019
Bride Guide #12 from Logan Temple Wedding Photographer Lauren Kay Photography.
Sometimes life just doesn’t go as you hoped. Right? Crap happens! You can’t control everything. I got married in the beginning of March. In the Mountain West. Which means it is cold and everything is dead. And remember the crazy circumstance I was living in and that it was midway through a semester? Well, I refused to accept my life how it actually was and tried to plan my wedding the way I had always envisioned.
If I would’ve embraced my circumstance, I like to think that I would’ve lived in our new place and gotten everything moved in and decorated so that when my husband moved in, he’d be moving into a home. I like to think we would’ve gotten married at the temple where we went to school, because that was the temple where we had created memories together. Besides, planning a wedding where I was actually living would’ve been so much simpler. Or I like to think I would’ve done something crazy like a destination wedding. Then we still could’ve been married where it was warm and had that outdoor celebration we both wanted.
Let go. Whatever your circumstances are, there’s probably something about them that’s not ideal. Not what you imagined. If you still try to plan the wedding you always wanted, it makes things complicated and leads to regret. Wishing something were different doesn’t change what actually is! You have to embrace your circumstances how they are! And if you do? You will be able to plan a wedding that is just as amazing as the one you always dreamed of. Maybe even more.
What circumstances do I wish were different? (Time of year, budget, family circumstances, work or school, etc.)
Now I want you look at your list and write down any ideas you can think of that could make that unideal circumstance work in your favor. For example: with a winter wedding – destination wedding somewhere warm, winter color scheme, snow pictures, hot chocolate.
Then choose which ideas you want to incorporate in order to totally embrace your circumstances.
Let go of any spite or agenda or anything you’re trying to prove. If your hair looks best pulled up, do an up-do girl. Don’t try to prove anything to anyone. And don’t try to prove anything to yourself either! Deep down you might actually want a wedding day that is totally all the things you swore you’d never do. Don’t be afraid of swallowing your pride, following those gut feelings, and doing whatever is really going to work best for you.
Ideally, I think most brides would love to have all the time in the world to plan the perfect wedding day. But the truth is, you don’t have all the time in the world. Brides who have beautiful days let people help them. If you want to make this work, you have to let other people help you.
I was so worried about offending someone that I hardly let anyone help me. But people respect that this is your day. It’s okay to tell your hairstylist you don’t like your hair like that and they need to try again. It’s okay to tell your bridesmaid you really don’t like the dress she picked out. If you do it with kindness and grace, people will be understanding. Ask others for help, be very honest and clear about your expectations, and let them help and serve you.
Who do I know and trust that can help me?